Mourning for America
Brass Subscriber
On a golf tour in Ireland, Tiger Woods drives his BMW into a petrol station in a remote part of the Irish countryside.​

The pump attendant obviously knows nothing about golf, greets him in a typical Irish manner completely unaware of who the golfing pro is.

Top of the mornin’ to yer, sir” says the attendant.

Tiger nods a quick “hello” and bends forward to pick up the nozzle.

As he does so, two tees fall out of his shirt pocket onto the ground.

“What are dose? asks the attendant.

“They’re called tees” replies Tiger.

“Well, what on the god’s earth are dey for?” inquires the Irishman.

“They’re for resting my balls on when I’m driving”, says Tiger.

“Fookin Jaysus”, says the Irishman, “BMW thinks of everything


Well-known member
Brass Subscriber
I told my girlfriend I put some petrol in her car and she says what’s that. Now me realizing that she doesn’t know it’s same thing, decided to mess with her... she’s always saying how I’m cheap because I’m always trying to pinch pennies where I can (not a lie) so I told her it’s kinda like gas but it’s cheaper. And she instantly went to “if your gonna be a cheap ass put the shit gas in your car and let me put gas in my own car” I then explained that petrol and gas are the same but they call it that in Europe and she says well this is America so call it the right thing. I love that girl